Monday, October 04, 2010

Bad mommy's rant.

There are two times where I can pretty much bank on feeling like a terrible mother.
Right before (and as) I am leaving for work in the morning.
(For "abandoning" my child and motherly duties, leaving them to my poor husband, in my pursuit of worldly things)

And from about 6 to 9 pm every night as I am desperately trying to calm my screaming child who refuses to eat, nurse, or otherwise be soothed despite my very best efforts. And while I know that Mr. D would be more than happy to put him in the swing and he would easily fall asleep in a heartbeat, I hate that stupid swing. It makes me feel replaced as a mother, and resentful that a silly mechanical thing can put the child I carried for 9 long months to bed and I can't...it's like a slap in the face from Mr. Graco himself.

Man. This parenting thing is way more complicated than I ever thought imaginable. Or, as a friend recently put it, "Its a thousand times harder than you could have ever imagined it would be. But somehow it's also a MILLION times more rewarding than you ever thought possible."

Amen.

4 comments:

Stina said...

I love this pic of baby D! SO cute! and about the swing, my cousin has three kids and she swears by her swing, so it's not replacing you, it's just a great tool moms use to sooth their babies, like a lullaby :)

The Loops said...

Who watches Dustin? I am still so worried about having kids because I don't know who will watch them. I feel so guilty about leaving my dog for the day I don't know what I will do with a kid. You are a great mom! Especially for resisting the swimg temptation.

Laura said...

oh my gosh that is the cutest picture. he is such a precious little guy!

Andrea said...

Ruth! Providing for your family is not pursuing worldly things. Jobs are not worldly, how else would we live?! Well, I guess you could go on medicaid and food stamps and the like. Don't beat yourself up! Remember, I look up to you and I better not be going to school for 9 years to pursue a worldly avenue!

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